Fifth day of Lent

The sermon at church yesterday was on salvation. So I can say this is the day after salvation. That’s an interesting and provoking thought for me – "the day after salvation." As I look deep within, I see a soul that was lifted from the muck and mire of sin and condemnation to life and liberty. But I also see a soul that has not had a straight line of spiritual growth. I have been a wanderer. I would have fit in well with Moses and the wandering Hebrews. Some seasons it seems I take two steps forward only to take three steps backward. But when I look at the long road from salvation to present day, God does allow me to see some progress in my spiritual development. While much of it has come through growing pains, nonetheless it has come. But there is still much more to come. I don’t always know what is coming next in God’s curriculum for me, but I am learning to trust the hand of God in my journey.

Having said that, I must be honest and state that there are still some sins that want to raise their ugly heads from time to time. One I dislike is my tendency to "pigeon hole" people. Why is it, Lord, that when people hurt me or say wrongful stuff about me that I want to put them in the pigeon hole of evil and antagonists FOREVER? I have such a hard time being a person full of grace (isn’t that what you want this preacher/pastor to always be?) while at the same time being a strong and confident person that will not stand for oppressive behavior and oppressive conversation. I sense this is the piece of me that you have in training these days. You’d think by now I’d have all of this down pat, but I don’t. So thanks, God, for what you’re teaching me. Forgive me for being a slow and reluctant learner.

I also see that you continue to work with me on my tendency to take the path of least resistance. Why would I think that this is your way? It never has been, and I suppose it never will be. My desire to please people and to be liked by them tempts me to stay very close to that path of least resistance. This is an area, Lord, where you must be seeing the need for work in me. Sometimes I think I am courageous while at other times, I feel like such a coward. Forgive me for being so wishy-washy with my confidence in you.

This is my "day after salvation." There’s still work to be done even though the best work has been done. I trust that I will look back at this day and see some wandering but also see some progress. Thanks, God, for never giving up on me.