Sixth day of Lent

Psalm 51 is a Psalm of Penitence. Most scholars believe it is a Psalm of David that was prayed after Nathan confronted him with his terrible sin of having an affair with Bathsheba and thus having her husband Uriah killed. If it wasn’t David’s Psalm, it sure could have been.
I still remember the feeling I used to get when I was ‘found out’ by my mom or dad when I had been ‘up to something’ I shouldn’t have been ‘up to.’ It was a sickening feeling that ran deep in my gut. I was caught, and there was absolutely nothing I could do to weasel my way out of the consequence. No excuse would work. I was done for, and punishment was coming my way. I still remember the feeling. I wonder if that is how David felt when Nathan said to him, "You are the Man!"

Sin is a funny thing. We all think we can get away with it. I don’t know what I was thinking when my mom told me not to go water skiing with my best friend Eddie, and yet I went anyway. Did I not think there would be a price for such behavior? I remember vividly my dad’s gentle voice (and sometimes his voice wasn’t gentle with my sins) as he talked with me about the consequences of my choice to disobey mom. It was almost like he understood my behavior, but for my sake, he could not allow me not to suffer some painful consequence. I remember looking at the floor while he gently talked with me. But you know what I don’t remember? I don’t remember what punishment was given. Isn’t that interesting? I wonder why I don’t remember that piece of the sin?

Maybe I don’t remember, because it was gentleness that took over. I knew I was wrong. Dad knew I was wrong. I think dad knew I knew that I was wrong to disobey mother. Maybe even in that moment grace took over and began to cleanse my memory of punishment. I’m not sure. But it is interesting that the Old Testament states very clearly that when I confess my sin that God takes my sin and remembers it no more (Jeremiah 31:34). If God forgets, then maybe God helps me forget also.

Wash me, cleanse me, purge me, and blot out my transgressions, Lord. Create in me a clean heart. Restore unto me the joy of your salvation. This remains my prayer. Thank you for your grace to me.